Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Let's try that again...

For those of you who follow me on Facebook, you know that I had a horrible day yesterday. It all had to do with a car repair that took way to long and me being stranded in a coffee house in another city all day. Seriously, SEVEN hours! Anyway, I've already gone over that story many times, to anyone who would listen, in order to try and vent the anger and frustration away, so now I want to focus on something good (I think) that came out of it.

Actually, I was kind of surprised by how deeply this whole experience upset me. Sure, anger at being treated poorly and frustrated that my day was wasted seemed natural, and I was a bit worried because it was snowing so I was afraid I'd be trapped away from home because of the delay. But it went further than that and I started to experience a bit of a meltdown sitting there in that coffee house. After about the 5 hour mark, I could barely think of anything but how alone (in the world) I felt, and, not to be overly dramatic or anything, I became nearly consumed by fear and panic. Even after I got home and was safely ensconced in my warm bed I felt pretty shaky.

Okay, so that doesn't sound so good, does it. (And it's probably made at least a few of you wonder whether I should look into changing my meds.) Well, the good part is I think it's motivated me to move beyond my hermit tendencies and try to reach out more to people, including here on the internet (thus, this blogpost). There have been times when blogging has actually intensified my feelings of aloneness, so this is a test. In order to really give it a fair test, I am committing to blogging at least two times a week for the month of March.

Please, don't leave me hanging. If you're out there and you're reading this, please let me know I am actually not alone by leaving comments to these postings. Even just a "hi" would suffice (or a "like" if you come across them on Facebook).

Thank you for your time and patience, and for still being there after my long absence.